the rip

people grow up

how many of you have this impression that being mature is way better than being adult
they actually, mature and adult, have this kind of relationship, they are alike, but not the same, they complement each other, but it's hard if either does not weigh down a little bit more

you can't contain everything in your body, you are a frail fickle container, swaying feebly, once melts and condenses, next freezes and hardens up, you just can't live in the world devoid of the phrase, that you can never have it all

now have you ever wondered why

people who do not think too much always seem to possess a vital quality that those thinkers don't

that right amount of sensitivity, of agility, of speed because they manage to get rid of preambling analysis

it's just that,
some people are mature, some others are adult

those who spend the major proportion of their days thinking are more inclined towards the quality of maturity, those better at the execution, at handling things, at giving off quick reaction are adult

none is inferior, neither superior

but what the hell, you can't have both at the same time, not at a very young age, your words, your actions, they all don't mean a thing, because they all are only in your head, buried down deep beneath a sacred chamber, gold plated, completely covered with haystack and wailing baby horses

you can't live there, you belong there, but you can't leave this place

what if you don't have both, what if you're neither of them? what if you've got no one around to tell which one you are? would you sink into the limbotic state of vapidness...

i only want to tell about

this child in me, she only wants to write. for herself, not for others.

she saw the words insurance, aircon service, plumber, water bill, electricity, she realised that she has to live all through this, she can't always be in a crackless cocoon of words, strangulated by her own strings of sentences, she can't reject the world, she needs insurance, aircon service, plumber, water bill and electricity.

she feels ill and giddy, shivering and tremulous, sickness all over her body

but there's a lot can be done.
man up.