I am very proud of myself. These past couple of weeks I have been binging on self-help content...I think I went a bit far but, I believe it has equipped me with the necessary knowledge to go through this "on my own"
Of course, companies and friends and family are great, but this is the time...I feel...like I have to "rise to the occasion" myself. This is the "challenging time" that will test my level of consciousness. Sometimes I forget that I have all the necessary tools to be well on my own. To "transmute" negativity into positivity, without resorting to denial. Because really, if you listen....if you drop all rationalization....you'll hear a soft hum of okayness, of peace, of joy. It is there within, you just have to listen. And life will show you the way.
Tuesday, June 2, 2020
Saturday, May 2, 2020
020520
All this time she's been thinking...what made her this way? What made her so anxious? She has to remember, anxiety is not her, it is her who is feeling the anxiety....
She can detach herself from this anxiety. Just observe it. She thought it was just pms, but she is observing that she is still vulnerable to external factors. That is okay. That is part of the process. She is not alone.... She has god, she has herself. She has her parents, no matter how imperfect they are. It is not about comparing the difficulties... Everybody has their own portion. She has to tap into her inner strength, and she knows how. Deep down she does. If she has to die, let's say, in a year, what changes will she make?
Trust, and surrender.... And trust, and surrender....
She can detach herself from this anxiety. Just observe it. She thought it was just pms, but she is observing that she is still vulnerable to external factors. That is okay. That is part of the process. She is not alone.... She has god, she has herself. She has her parents, no matter how imperfect they are. It is not about comparing the difficulties... Everybody has their own portion. She has to tap into her inner strength, and she knows how. Deep down she does. If she has to die, let's say, in a year, what changes will she make?
Trust, and surrender.... And trust, and surrender....
Sunday, April 19, 2020
200420
Why you should have faith:
1. You have seen people with worse mental disorders (bipolar, etc) have healthy relationships
2. Your relationship with your parents before were in deep shit, but now it is greater than ever!
3. You need anchors in your life and you have them
4. There is always a solution
Resources:
https://www.talkspace.com/blog/dating-someone-with-anxiety-what-you-need-to-know-and-do/
https://www.verywellmind.com/how-anxiety-can-cause-relationship-problems-1393090
Ginger (the app! - https://techcrunch.com/2019/09/04/ginger-an-mit-spinout-providing-app-based-mental-health-coaching-to-workers-raises-35m/)
This blurb:
Anxiety has nothing to do with courage or character. Nothing at all.
Courage is feeling the edge of yourself and moving beyond it. We all have our limits but people with anxiety are just more aware of theirs. Despite this, they are constantly facing up to the things that push against their edges. That’s courage, and people with anxiety have it in truckloads. Remind them that you see who they are and that this has nothing to do with that anxiety thing they do sometimes. People with anxiety are strong – you have to be to live with something like that. They’re sensitive – they’ll be as sensitive to you and what you need as they are to their environment. That makes them pretty awesome to be with. They’re reliable – to control for the potential of something triggering an attack, anxious people will go the extra step to make sure there’s a plan and that everyone is safe, happy and have everything they need. They’re intelligent – they’re thinkers (which is what gets in their way sometimes). They can be funny, kind, brave and spirited. So I suppose it’s like this – they’re no different to anyone else. As with everyone, the thing that trips them up sometimes (their anxiety) is also the thing that lifts them above the crowd.
Don’t try to make sense of what’s happening.
People with anxiety know that their anxiety doesn’t make sense. That’s what makes it so difficult. Explaining that there’s nothing to worry about won’t mean anything – it just won’t – because they already know this. (Oh boy do they know this!) They would have told themselves not to worry a billion times the number of times you’ve said it to them. If it hasn’t helped so far then one more won’t make a difference. Be understanding, calm and relaxed and above all else, just be there. Anxiety feels flighty and there’s often nothing that feels better than having someone beside you who’s grounded, available and okay to go through this with you without trying to change you. Telling them not to worry is as effective as asking you not to think about pink elephants. Really try not to think about pink elephants swinging from a vine. With flowers in their hair. Just stop thinking about them, those crazy big pink babes. See how that works?
1. You have seen people with worse mental disorders (bipolar, etc) have healthy relationships
2. Your relationship with your parents before were in deep shit, but now it is greater than ever!
3. You need anchors in your life and you have them
4. There is always a solution
Resources:
https://www.talkspace.com/blog/dating-someone-with-anxiety-what-you-need-to-know-and-do/
https://www.verywellmind.com/how-anxiety-can-cause-relationship-problems-1393090
Ginger (the app! - https://techcrunch.com/2019/09/04/ginger-an-mit-spinout-providing-app-based-mental-health-coaching-to-workers-raises-35m/)
This blurb:
Anxiety has nothing to do with courage or character. Nothing at all.
Courage is feeling the edge of yourself and moving beyond it. We all have our limits but people with anxiety are just more aware of theirs. Despite this, they are constantly facing up to the things that push against their edges. That’s courage, and people with anxiety have it in truckloads. Remind them that you see who they are and that this has nothing to do with that anxiety thing they do sometimes. People with anxiety are strong – you have to be to live with something like that. They’re sensitive – they’ll be as sensitive to you and what you need as they are to their environment. That makes them pretty awesome to be with. They’re reliable – to control for the potential of something triggering an attack, anxious people will go the extra step to make sure there’s a plan and that everyone is safe, happy and have everything they need. They’re intelligent – they’re thinkers (which is what gets in their way sometimes). They can be funny, kind, brave and spirited. So I suppose it’s like this – they’re no different to anyone else. As with everyone, the thing that trips them up sometimes (their anxiety) is also the thing that lifts them above the crowd.
Don’t try to make sense of what’s happening.
People with anxiety know that their anxiety doesn’t make sense. That’s what makes it so difficult. Explaining that there’s nothing to worry about won’t mean anything – it just won’t – because they already know this. (Oh boy do they know this!) They would have told themselves not to worry a billion times the number of times you’ve said it to them. If it hasn’t helped so far then one more won’t make a difference. Be understanding, calm and relaxed and above all else, just be there. Anxiety feels flighty and there’s often nothing that feels better than having someone beside you who’s grounded, available and okay to go through this with you without trying to change you. Telling them not to worry is as effective as asking you not to think about pink elephants. Really try not to think about pink elephants swinging from a vine. With flowers in their hair. Just stop thinking about them, those crazy big pink babes. See how that works?
200420
Hello. Do I have to announce that I'm here again? It's a process of trial and error, I believe. Okay, let's get practical. Was listening to Pema's video while I could not get some sleep. Fell asleep then got woken up again, then listened to the whole thing. By this time, everything to me sounds like the same thing....and I realized it's not about all the theories. It's all about how you feel. E.g. letting go, fearlessness, tenderness, acceptance, surrender, etc.... and I am scared that I will never get there. I really don't know whether I'm making any progress. Sometimes I feel like I get a glimpse of them, but sometimes I also lose them. But for now, I am just going to list things that make me feel better:
1. Exercising
2. Meditating
3. Pam (with a certain hangover)
4. Controlled breathing
5. Talking to a friend
6. Yoga/Yin Yoga
7. Sleep (if possible)
8. "We're all in the same boat"
9. Knowing that there are people going through the same thing
10. Acceptance
11. Talking to my mom
12. Hugging my pet
13. Try religious rituals?
1. Exercising
2. Meditating
3. Pam (with a certain hangover)
4. Controlled breathing
5. Talking to a friend
6. Yoga/Yin Yoga
7. Sleep (if possible)
8. "We're all in the same boat"
9. Knowing that there are people going through the same thing
10. Acceptance
11. Talking to my mom
12. Hugging my pet
13. Try religious rituals?
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